In Other News

If my life were newsworthy, here are the headlines that may have flashed their way across the news ticker in the past 36 hours:

 

Heavyweight Drinking Glass No Match for Angry Toddler

Out With the Old, In With the New Furniture

New PreTeen Craze Sweeps Kunkel Home: Metallic Aqua Nail Polish

Busy Housewife Shampoos Carpets Four Times in One Day

Creative Toddler Ahead of His Time? Plays Piano… With Markers

Laptop Adapter Grows Legs and Runs Away in the Night

Woman Sells Same Dryer Twice in One Day

Grade Schooler Gives up Wiping and Flushing to Save Planet

The Sink that Refuses to Drain

Flat Tire Leaves Desperate Husband Stranded

Frantic Conspirators Race to Hide Soiled Carpet

Band-Aid Shortage Riots Looming

Rising Artists Uses Own Body for Canvas

Crazed Hostess Hides Dirty Dishes in Oven

Popular Science Magazine Launches Special Bipolar Science Edition

Over Filled Dumpster Creates Border Skirmishes Between Angry Residents and Agressive Squirrels

Crowded Holiday Sale at Bread Outlet Leaves Shoppers with Bruised Ankles

Pita Vs. Pizza = Mass Confusion at Mealtime

 

 

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. jabyro
    Oct 11, 2011 @ 00:34:31

    Wow, what a difference a day makes!!! Love the headlines!

    Reply

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